Documenting Our Alzheimer's Journey

I know I promised that this blog will not become devoted to Alzheimer's. And I still promise. But...it has been almost all-consuming for me to navigate this condition. This space is where I share my stories and this is Part of the Story. 

I've shared some of the bone-crushing sadness that has sometimes overtaken me. I'm thinking many of the AZ posts downplay the sadness. 

It's important to me that I don't sugar coat what we are going through. 

I try to communicate the pockets of joy that I still find so I can remind myself of the sweet moments.  It's way too easy to let myself fall into a serious depression which will not be good for either of us.

Don't let me kid you...I have had days when I know I'm dealing with low-grade depression. Those days are hard. I don't want to be a liar. It would be a lie to imply that this isn't hard. Everyone's experience is different. It would be disrespectful to other AZ caregivers (and sufferers) if all my AZ posts were sunshine and rainbows.

As each new symptom presents itself, I try to figure out what the symptom means. Is it normal? Is it a cause for concern? Has his condition progressed?

The answer is, yes his condition has progressed.

It's hard for me to know how just how much he has changed because I am with him every day. At least once a week I question if I can be his caregiver. Do I have the physical strength? Am I able to keep him safe?

To try to give myself a timeline of his condition, I'm creating a series entitled "Our Alzheimer's Journey".  These snapshots are based on emails I have written to keep loved ones informed.

But, I promise (again) not all my future posts will be about Alzheimer's.