Retreat Quiet Time

I have to have "me" time. Preferably every day. It doesn't have to be large chunks of time...but it does have to be alone time. On a normal daily basis, I find small pockets of time that I just grab for a quiet moment. The best "me" time is when I'm not thinking. Not contemplating. Not trying to attain a zen moment. It's just me, alone and quiet. Just for a moment. 

On our retreat, as you've already seen, the setting was perfect for "me time". Just perfect. 

The retreat's topic was relevant and definitely worth exploring. The overall topic was about "connecting" and living in the "now". When we find ourselves living in the moment, we feel replenished.

Inspired, I grabbed my beach chair and headed out to watch the waves and birds. 

I had not gotten settled when I looked out on the water's horizon and saw a single dolphin silently swim by. No drama. No splashing around. Just passing by. A few minutes later he surfaced again. I realized that my breath was catching with excitement. I wanted to get closer. But if I moved would I lose sight of him? I decided to risk it. 

So I ran to the pier. I RAN. I don't know if anyone saw me or what they would have thought. I mean I clearly wasn't going "out for a run". I ran to the pier and ran to the end of the pier with my camera in tow. It's a point and shoot (I left the SLR at home). So there I am at the end of the pier waiting and trying to guess where he will surface next. 

It was then that I realized that the camera has absolutely nothing to save it from being dropped and lost in the ocean. No strap to put around my wrist...nothing. Here I must tell you that it isn't "technically" my camera. It's my husband's. And much like someone being told "don't drop this", all I could think was "I'm going to drop this". 

"Focus," I told myself. Stop being afraid of dropping the dang camera and take some pictures. Oops, he was just on the surface and now he's under again. He is silent. Just silent. He's so close to me that I know he will be passing by any minute. I begin to count to see how long between surfacing. I wanted to time when to snap the picture. Snapping the picture when I see him is too late. He's already below the water before the shutter finishes the shot.

Dolphin about to go back under. See the blowhole?

He's up again. I push the shutter down and try to have the camera do a rapid series of shots. Instead, the camera freezes. It takes minutes between shots. So when I take a shot too soon, the camera is locked when the dolphin surfaces and is actually there for a picture. I was living in the moment. Right? Experiencing nature and enjoying one of God's creatures. Except, I wasn't.  I was stressed! The camera was distracting me from my "serenity now" moment. So I just stopped. I put the camera in my pocket...trying not to think un-church like thoughts about the stinking camera. I took several deep breaths and decided to be quiet and still. 

I was rewarded. There were several dolphins in the water. They were not swimming in a school, they were each having their own quiet alone time. Silently gliding by. And then I saw two fins gliding together. As they got closer I saw it was a cow and her pup. They were swimming in concentric circles going further and further out each time. The baby moving in time with the mother. Beautiful.

I did get some pics to share (though not of the mother and baby). It's about balance, right? Balance the stress of "getting the shot" with the serenity of just watching. 

In the midst of running to the pier for my photo op, I forgot to bring my glasses. I need them for close up. What that meant is that I could not see what I was photographing in the camera's small LED screen. I was "shooting blind". At one point, when I was sure I had gotten several shots of the dolphin, I looked at the camera and realized it was pointed at the SKY! 

Beach Retreat

This past weekend I went on a Beach Retreat with the women in my church. We were on Oak Island. I've never been there before but found it to be lovely. Here are a few pictures I took while I was there.

Our Retreat theme was "Relax, Rejuvenate, Reflect and Re-connect". The setting was perfect for all of those things.

I'm still processing some of the things we explored. It was a difficult transition back to real life on Monday. Sunday was in the 60*s. Monday was cold, rainy, and sleet. What a difference!

But like they say: "In like a Lion out like a Lamb".

Post with No Name

Blog...I just can't quit you. I keep thinking about it...but I keep coming back.

I like the idea of writing...telling stories and having them instantly published. I LOVE that my little place in the world gets sweet readers and I get so encouraged with comments.

Fun on the Drive Home

I've probably mentioned that my drive to and from work has been a nightmare. 

Well...since driving to and from work for 90 days the commute has become much less intimidating. In fact...it's sort of fun.

I a saw a  pink Jeep the other afternoon. I wish I could have gotten the front. The headlights had pink eyelashes! 

This is the kind of thing that makes my drive so much more interesting. 

Spring is Almost Here

So excited that Friday is here! And spring will be here before we know it. Just nineteen more days until spring is officially here. We just need to hold on a few more days!

I had my third B12 shot on Monday and my last shot will be next week. I'm hoping to feel energetic in time for spring.

Soon I won't have any excuses for not starting my "Get Lean in 2013" project. I keep thinking about it....I'm almost ready to start.

I'm sharing a pic of the jeep I saw the other day. How funny is this?

Happy first day of March! And happy weekend.

Rainy Days...

Today was a crazy, cold, rainy day. And, the cloud cover was very low. Not typical Piedmont, NC weather at all. The cloud cover so close to the ground...that is Seattle weather.

The pic to the left is from Bellevue (East Side of the Seattle/Puget Sound area). We lived in a high rise in Bellevue. A different life, but a good one. I took this pic one morning before work. Jacob's early life was in a high rise. The cloud cover and drizzle is what I mean by Seattle weather.

Last week I was thinking of giving up the blog. I hadn't written all weekend and I just thought...maybe I'm done.

But then I didn't actually quit. Wednesday night driving home I heard a song I had not heard before. I was seriously happy to hear this song that was new to me and I was inspired to post.

Happy Friday

Happy Friday. I went dark on ya didn't I? I only got posts up 3X this week. It was a personal goal of mine to post each day during the week. Oh well....that didn't happen this week.  So, we'll see how next week goes.

I'm getting excited about the SUPER BOWL. I'm really torn about who to pull for. I think it'll be a great game. Sunday plans are: watch football and eat chips and dip.

Getting My Zen On

Remember I told you that Jordan and I went to the Butterfly House at the local Life/Science Museum?

One of my 2013 goals is to have more quality quiet time. And, if I can be in nature during that quiet time...then so much the better! The Butterfly House offered a sweet respite that served both my need to sit and listen and look as well as my husband's need to look and photograph. We both were able to enjoy nature in a truly up close and personal way. 

Here are a few of Jordan's lovely shots.

Often when we go out together we both have our cameras. We have different approaches to what we photograph, so it's really cool when we get home and look at each other's shots. Jordan continues to help me learn to be a better photographer.

Pondering "LUCK"

I've been pondering the concept of "luck" and had some sort of epiphany that I'm was dying to share. It came to me during a stream of consciousness conversation I was having with my husband. ~And by "conversation" I mean I was talking and he was nearby. {I'm pretty sure he was listening. :) }

New Beginnings

I feel like I have so much to talk about that I don't know where to begin. Some people {most?} would simply say: "Start at the beginning." But, I'm never able to figure out what event was actually the beginning of the story I'm about to tell. Actually, in this case, this story IS the beginning.

I'm so excited about things that are happening for me. Several things are new and fresh. You may remember that I mentioned I was working some things out. Well, things are working out in beautiful ways.

Today, {1/2/13}, I begin a new job. I'm writing this before I actually arrive at my new employer's office to begin my first day. Just telling you about it here gives me huge butterflies. {Butterflies in a good way!} I'm super excited about this opportunity. I decided to wait until everything was firmed up before "going public" with my change.

I've shared before that my "profession" is banking. I rarely talk about real work because who would think banking is interesting? --Other bankers...that's who. But my blog is really not where I want to focus on my day job. Instead, it's where I want to explore other aspects of my life that make me interesting. 

All of that said, the fact is work/job/employment often takes up a huge amount of my waking hours and takes up a huge number of brain cells. So, it is a huge part of my life...and one that I wanted to share with you here.

I absolutely loved working at my prior job. I had a seriously cool boss. She is smart, fun and a great advocate. She is a huge part of what makes the entire team such a fun group of people. 

The fact that I enjoyed my job {and was good at it...really, really good at it} and that I enjoyed my team members, as well as my boss, made the decision to make a change a difficult one.

But, the new position has the opportunity for me to get back to a part of banking that I truly love. And, the person I will be working for will be an amazing mentor. I'm looking forward to the type of work I will be doing. 

So, last week I said "Goodbye" to people and a job that I enjoyed and where I felt at home. Today, I will be saying "Hello" to people I do not know {yet}. I will be saying "Hello" to a company I have not gotten to know yet and a role that is new to me. All of this is wonderfully exciting {and just a teeny bit scary.}

Wish me well.

UPDATE:  It was a GREAT day.

Outside My Window

I have a wonderful tree outside my bedroom window. Every chance I get, I leave this window open. There is usually a bird that is nestled inside the foliage that wakes me up with lovely songs. In the summer months, sometimes the bird(s) are awakened and sing just a little when they should be sleeping. --I think that the light in the bedroom must confuse them. I kept this window slightly open almost all summer. I was always surprised by how early the birds begin their morning chirps. Let me just say it is before actual sunrise.

Looking out my window, I often see branches moving and assume it's a bird making themselves at home. This morning it was a squirrel.

There must be some sort of berry on the branch tips because Squirrel was going from limb to limb and furiously eating something. Squirrel did not know I was there. He did not feel me watching {spying}as he kept stretching a little too far for his next berry.

If I want to see Autumn, I just have to look out my window! 

That Weekend is Here

It's super late & I need to be asleep. Daughter (on the left) and I (on the right) will be driving 2.5 hours away to be part of the Avon Breast Cancer walk tomorrow. Eek.  I haven't packed.

But, I couldn't bear the thought of going into the weekend without a post to send us off to our adventure. So...that's what this is. A whew...I can't believe we are going to do this post.

Think about us!

My Serenity List

I've been experimenting with introducing moments of relaxation into my every day. For me, that includes some amount of alone time. I recently realized that I have not been giving myself my alone time. I added it back to my work day a couple of weeks ago and I found myself to be calmer at work.  I sometimes worry that I appear "anti-social" because I choose to eat lunch alone. I enjoy my co-workers...but, like I said, without my alone time, I may not be at my best. I've recently found a breakout room at work that is rarely in use around lunch time. I've been disappearing in there with my iPhone or book or magazine for my lunch hour.  Today, I read portions of the most recent issue of Martha Stewart Living. Actually, I looked at many of the beautiful photographs and read one (that's right, only one) article. The article was approximately two pages and spoke to me with tidbits I didn't know had been researched and that I find exciting. Forgive me for not remembering the title of the article or the author. But, if you decide you want to seek out the article, it should be pretty obvious which one it is (once I explain). The article was about the psychological benefits of creating crafts. As you know, I've recently taken up painting as a hobby and I find that time stands still when I'm "in the zone". When I complete my work I'm both "spent" and refreshed. It doesn't make sense that I would be both things at the same time.  The article explained that crafting can have similar benefits to meditation. It said that the physical and creative part of crafting required full presence and the part of the brain that "problem-solves" (my word) has to turn itself off during the craft project. The mind can not just "turn off" on its own. But when the brain is engaged in something that takes full concentration, the mind can take a rest from the constant thinking and problem solving that it gravitates to.  The article quoted a psychology researcher and explained how different locations of the brain are engaged in different activities and how making sure that the brain gets some "down time" helps a person gain the feeling of relaxation when crafting. There are some releases of feel-good hormones as well. One is released because of the physical repetitiveness of an activity. One is released with the pleasure of something beautiful and yet another is released if the project is being created as a gift. One factoid I remember is that some crafts (it specifically referred to knitting) can have the same relaxing result as petting a dog or a cat. --We've all heard the studies of how petting a dog or cat reduces blood pressure and promotes heart health. One thing I should point out is the MSL article emphasized that the act of creating was what produced the positive health and emotional benefits. The final result of the project was not material to the health results. The emphasis is on the "doing" of the thing.    Tonight I tried to find the article so I could give you the link (which I could not find for you). But I did find a few other articles that seemed to bear out the Martha Stewart Living article. One article I found was a guest post on Too Depressed.Com. The post is  "Reducing Depression with Hands-On Activities". by Kathryn Vercillo.  Kathryn also blogs at: Crochet Concupiscence.  This information helps me realize that I need to prioritize crafting and art as an important part of my life. For today, I think I should focus on increasing the several things for a happy (and healthy) life.

I will call this my SERENITY LIST

1. Exercise {Endorphins, Increased Stamina, Help with Asthma} 2. Quiet {Alone}Time (but not too much). 3. A Mindfulness Practice. 4. Crafting.
Who's with me?

Mindfulness and Bread Making

A couple of weeks ago I had the opportunity to learn from a master artisan bread maker. Actually, I was with a group invited to share an evening at a local bakery. The owner and his son are both master bakers as well as Zen meditation practitioners. The mini-workshop was to teach the experience of baking bread as a mindful practice. 

This bakery is not the pastry-type bakery. They are primarily a bread bakery (wholesale) that operates a cafe as well. 

Our evening began with a discussion of mindfulness, meditation, and incorporating this into everyday life. The mini-workshop was introduced with an essay by Edward Espe Brown called "When You Wash the Rice, Wash the Rice". The idea is that if you focus on what you are doing in the moment you can achieve moments of meditative quiet and peace. Frank (the owner) talked about the fact that Western culture emphasizes the mental and emotional "self" with limited attention paid to physical and tactile experiences of life. The point of the mini-workshop is that you can choose to "be quiet" while you do your "work" and achieve mindfulness.

Aside: I am Christian. For me, meditation and mindfulness can be practiced by anyone of any faith. I think that everyone's experience of mindfulness is their own just as everyone's experience of faith is their own. Someone I'm close to worries that Eastern practices associated with Eastern religions cannot "mix" with the Christian faith. My feeling is that meditation can be used in prayer and "mindfulness" can be an approach to "Prayer without ceasing". 

Back to Baking Bread: 

The goal was to achieve a quiet mind before going into the kitchen to work with and knead our dough for bread. As you can imagine, the thought is that the rhythm of the kneading can be used as a way to enter mindfulness. We were to focus on the rhythm of kneading the dough as a way to maintain our mindful quietness. Focus on the tactile sensations of the dough as it changed with the kneading. 

We were led through several minutes of quietness before the kneading/baking experience  I must say just those few moments of quietness listening to the person reminding me to focus on my breath really did bring me into a quiet and calm state of mind. I think often when I am "quiet" my mind is not quiet so I do not feel refreshed afterward. After the meditation (which for me was simply focused quietness) we were to enter the kitchen with the same "spirit of quietness" to begin to knead our dough. 

Reality of the Experience: 

The spell was broken immediately as the group moved from our sitting quietness to the kitchen. Chatter was immediate as people walked to the kitchen. I don't know if it was excitement or the Western culture that when you are in the company of others that you need to be talking. But one of the keys to mindfulness is to be able to stay quiet even when your surroundings are not quiet. So, I quietly stood back and waited for instruction and tried not to break the spell that I had been under. 

In the kitchen, participants eagerly asked questions about the bread-making process like: "What temperature is the oven?"; "What are the proportions of yeast?" These questions (and their answers) were not important to me. I have no real intention of baking bread on a regular basis. And if I do bake bread, I will be able to find the right recipe with the "how-to steps". 

I suppose the same could be said of my personal goal to focus on the mindfulness portion of the workshop. I'm sure I can find a book with a "recipe for how to be mindful". But, some things have to be experienced. For me, the moments of quietness, where my mind was not in a state of worry or problem solving, were something I don't think I would have understood by simply reading the steps. And, like so many good things, doing is learning. 

I'm glad I went. 

I'd love you to share when you've found a new way to experience something or a new way to think about something. 

Have a happy Wednesday.

Lake Visit (s)

Yesterday I was true to my word. We were OUT. {All Day Long} We didn't quite get out of the house before sunrise. But we did get out pretty early. It was really early for a Saturday. And, just as we planned, we were out taking photographs. Well...the Hubs was taking photos. Something happened and neither of my cameras had their batteries charged. 

~~Oops. 
No matter...off we went. Hubs had working cameras and I was excited to get out into nature. We went to the same lake where I participated in Dragon Boat Racing. 
We went to two lakes, actually.  The lake was a good 40-minute drive and by the time we got there the lake's morning mist had lifted. The day was a perfect blue sky autumn day. The sun burned brightly early while the wind was soft and the air crisp. 

When we drove into the lake park's entrance I breathed a sigh of happiness. 

You'll remember that we lived in the Seattle area for quite a few years. For three of those years, we lived walking distance to Lake Washington. 

Here's a pic of D. on our porch/deck when we lived in Kirkland. Can you see the lake beyond the trees? This is what I fell in love with. 

And This,

And This.

After my life in the Puget Sound mountains and lakes make me feel at home. 

So, while my husband was taking photos around the lake's perimeter I was soaking in the view. Just sitting and watching and looking and loving! 

Oh, and I snapped this pic with my iPhone. 

Promises of Fall

Sometimes I get the Sunday Blues. I don't know if I've written about this before.  I don't really know what causes it.  I suppose it's knowing that my weekend is almost over.  My time that  I feel the most like me is coming to a close. I often feel that I didn't squeeze every drop of potential out of my weekend.
On Sunday evenings,  I begin to feel blue that my time is almost up. 
I remember getting the Sunday blues even when I was in grade school. Almost like a let down after birthday presents have been opened at a birthday party. The feeling that the party is almost over and it's almost time to go home.
I'm writing this on a Sunday early evening...but the good news is right this very minute I do not have the blues. I'm sitting here sort of holding my breath and thinking "How about that. No blues." And I wonder why that is. Why no blues? Perhaps it is because I feel completely relaxed at this very moment. Completely at peace with the fact that I did everything I wanted to do and nothing I didn't want to do. {Emphasis on nothing I didn't want to do...maybe?} I did not do any chores...not that I really ever do chores...I have the best Hubby in the world that shoulders so many of the chores that I don't enjoy.  Another wonderful thing about this day is the weather and the sounds of nature just outside my window. Yesterday was lovely too. A blue sky day. Breezy with the fresh feeling cooling weather. Delightful. I spent quite a lot of time out in the Sun Room with the windows open watching birds at our feeders while I played with my own birds. 
I can only guess that there are no blues today because I am completely and blissfully happy in THIS very moment. I content. I am loving the promise of Fall.

D's Walks for Cancer Awareness

Isn't this just the cutest picture That's my mother wearing the hat and gloves. It makes me happy just looking at the lovely green dress and jacket.

My two sisters and I are with Mom taking our Easter morning picture.  (Dad is behind the camera.) I talk about my sisters quite a lot. We are very close in age. I'm the redhead on the far right. Sis is on the left and Sissy is in the chair. {Aren't we just too cute for words?}

Jump ahead many years...and there I am with a daughter of my own. (Cute, right?) Sometimes Daughter reminds me so much of Sissy. They have very similar points of view. Somehow, they see things the same way and express themselves very similarly. 

Many, many happy memories of hanging out with sisters as well as cousins growing up. That's one of the neat things about growing up walking distance from where your parents grew up. 

Hubs and I weren't the "stay in your hometown" kind of couple when we got married and started making a life. So, until two years ago, we never lived in the same town I grew up in. We enjoyed our "big city" lives we built.
We are also enjoying being "home" now.

All of this is to tell you that today I'm feeling quite happy to be living so close family. So many happy moments include Daughter and my sisters as well as cousins and Mamacita.

You may remember I talked about Danielle (aka Daughter) signing us up for the Ovarian Cancer Awareness walk (last year).  Well, this year we are participating in the Avon Breast Cancer Awareness walk. This walk takes place in several cities at different times of the year. Our walk is in NC and takes place in October. Let me clarify. Danielle is WALKING.  I am part of the CREW. 

Both Danielle and I are passionate about supporting cancer awareness and fundraising. So many people are touched by cancer. Luckily, more and more people are able to survive and live full lives. I believe that is a testament to the advances made by research. We lost our mother to cancer (Ovarian). She was much too young. I have a friend that is a breast cancer survivor. My daughter works for a surgeon and sees many breast cancer survivors as part of her job. 

So, next month, just 48 days from now...Daughter & I will be wearing pink. She will be walking 39 miles. I will be doing whatever is required to support the effort. And, we will both be sleeping in a pink tent. 

To do this, we must raise at least $1800. We are less than $500 away from this goal. If you would like to donate, please use the donation link below. 

Any cancer is horrific. I firmly believe that when we support research and awareness for one type of cancer, we are vicariously supporting research and awareness for all cancers. I hope you will consider helping us reach our goal so that we can go walk our bootie off (Danielle's bootie) for a really good cause.

NC Waterfall Photos Available for Viewing

You remember that last month that my Hubby and I spent several days in the NC Mountains, photographing waterfalls.  I promised photos would follow...and here they are. I hope that you enjoy the photographs.